A good BDSM scene meets the expectations of both partners. If it doesn’t, it means that you aren’t doing something right. Before you embark on the BDSM, you need to create a perfect environment for it. Otherwise, it may turn out as the biggest disappointment you ever deal with in your life.
When you are expecting your first scene of a BDSM engagement, you may feel overwhelmed. It is because you may not have an idea about what to expect from the whole session. Moreover, you don’t know how to react to the different aspects that you may encounter.
In BDSM, a scene is used to refer to the BDSM engagement between the partners. The idea is to push the boundaries of romance as you have fun. The activities partners engage in vary from one relationship to another. What makes the best session? Here are the important BDSM steps that you should follow:
What to Do Before the BDSM Scene
Your experience during the scene depends on the preparation you do as a partner. If you don’t work on things in advance, you may not like the outcome. The best way to go about it is to have an idea about the activities you expect to engage in. What are the things you should do before the session?
- Create a workable BDSM checklist
As BDSM partners, you shouldn’t do things spontaneously. If you do, you may end up engaging in something that your partner doesn’t like. That means you may not proceed with the scene to its completion. The first thing is to create a list of the things you both intend to accomplish during the session.
You can write down what you both like. Everyone should create the list independent of the other. The specific BDSM aspects that you can have in your lists include nipple torture, nudity, and spanking, among others. The more activities you have on your list, the better for both of you.
You can come together as a couple and discuss the content of your lists. Create a new list with the BDSM activities that you both love. If there is something that either of you doesn’t like, consider if it’s worth a compromise. The final list should have activities that you are both comfortable doing.
- Prepare the BDSM location
Which room should you use for the session? It could be the bedroom, your hotel room, or a special BDSM space. You should create a scene that’s BDSM friendly here. For example, you can have music. Alternatively, you can light candles.
- Groom for the occasion
A good scene in BDSM is one where both partners have fun without restrictions. Make things comfortable for each other. Prepare the straps and handcuffs if they are required. You can also clean up where necessary.
What Is Required During the BDSM Scene?
How you begin and carry on during the scene is important. You shouldn’t engage in BDSM activities that you didn’t agree on from the start. How do you ensure the whole scene is a success? Here are the things you should do:
- Signal the beginning
You should both agree on how to start the scene. For instance, the dominant partner can use ropes to tie the submissive partner. To show that you are ready for everything that is about to come your way, you should lie in a position that turns on your dominant partner. You can then tell your partner about how good they look.
- Do things procedurally
The next step in the scene could be to blindfold your partner. When the submissive partner is disoriented, the dominant one feels powerful. You don’t know what your partner is up to makes the whole BDSM experience enjoyable. You should trust your BDSM partner.
To ensure that everything works out according to plan, focus on the scene. Do the things you both of you love. It could include issuing verbal commands or stay quiet. It all depends on what you prefer. One scene may not be the same as another.
- Create a Perfect scene
The nervousness and the uncertainty of the submissive partner make the whole PDSM interesting. You shouldn’t follow the activities in order of the list you created together. Instead, you should be random in your approach. As a dominant partner, you should check if the sub is enjoying the experience.
BDSM is about consent. As a submissive partner, you are free to send a signal in a case where you aren’t comfortable. It’s at this point that the safe words come in. Use them to direct your partner to either slow down or stop.
How to Act After the BDSM Scene
BDSM is usually intense. Regardless of your level of experience in this field, you are likely to feel overwhelmed. For example, the adrenaline rush pushes your body to the limit. While imbalance is good during the scene, you need to control it when you finish the session.
At the end of the BDSM, both of you are likely to be tired. It’s time to take time and relax. That way, you can recover both physically and emotionally. At this time, you drink water or enjoy your cup of coffee. The faster you can take charge of your emotions, the better for both of you.
After you are in a good state, it is time to patch things up. Clean yourselves and apply some lotion. Where one of the partners has sustained injuries, it’s time to treat them. If you aren’t in a state to offer after-care to your partner, you should let them know about it in advance. That way, they know how to proceed after the BDSM.
Finally, you shouldn’t underestimate the power of music as you work on your recovery. Alternatively, you can watch a movie you love. Within no time, you can be ready for the next session. You should have fun during BDSM!